RUTH EMERY: COACHING CREATIVES FOR A HEALTHIER MUSIC INDUSTRY

WORDS EMILIE LOUIZIDES - IMAGERY COURTESY OF RUTH EMERY

Drinking coffee with music industry veteran Ruth Emery is an experience that can only be described as equal parts fascinating, inspiring, and therapeutic. With 22 years of experience overall, six of which were spent working at Universal, and the last twelve being dedicated to running her own PR company, Ruth’s culmination of knowledge is now taking shape in the form of coaching artists and creative professionals. Knowing better than most how fast-paced and overwhelming the music industry can be, Ruth’s intention is to help empower her clients to unleash their highest potential, re-frame their internal critical voice, and step into their power.

For Ruth, this new chapter is deeply personal. While it was creative and fun, working in the corporate side of music gradually sent her into burnout, while she came to the realization that she ultimately wanted a family and would have to do things differently. After quitting her job at the label, Ruth started Yes Please, an independent music agency specialising in publicity. Her self-awareness around the importance of carving her own path is exactly what she encourages artists and their teams to do for themselves, so that ecosystems of support can be built, and everyone can thrive.

For artists, managers and people working at labels today, Ruth relies on her decades of work to share what’s actually important for building and sustaining a career in the music industry, while preserving and improving the mental health of everyone who’s part of the equation. In honor of World Mental Health Day, Ruth's insights are right on track for a healthier, more sustainable music industry.

Emilie Louizides: For our readers who are just getting to know you, can you tell us a bit about your substantial foundation of work in the music industry?

 Ruth Emery: When I was a teenager, I knew I wanted to work in the music industry. I was in Glasgow, and at the time, music felt very London-focused, and it felt like this impenetrable industry – I didn’t know anyone who worked in it, and I couldn’t find a way in. I got a job at a London agency and ultimately ended up working for Virgin Student, which was like Facebook before Facebook, it was owned by Richard Branson, the owner of Virgin Records. At a summer party I saw Richard Branson and I went up to him and said I wanted to work in the music industry, and could I have work experience at his record label? And he said, ‘oh go and talk to that guy over there,’ and it was the head of A&R, this guy called Malcolm, and he was Scottish, so we immediately got on. Ultimately Malcolm and this guy Kevin – who was an A&R Scout – and I had a really good chat, and then me and Kevin started going to gigs together and a job came up at V2 Records and he recommended me for it, which I didn’t get, but then I applied for the next one that came up which was Promo Assistant that I did get! So that was my way into the industry – persistence and a bit of blagging!

From there I was working in the promo team, working across campaigns for artists like Paul Weller, Ray Davies, Elbow, and at the time they had Liberty X – this was a while ago – and it was just like, wow, this is everything I wanted to do, working with artists, covering promo. It was just really amazing and exciting.

After being there for a couple years, I was headhunted for a role at Polydor in the TV department. So, I went to work at Polydor, and it did feel like I’d come from the indie world to the major label world – so different. Much bigger teams, a lot of very different, very strong personalities. It was quite tricky at first, but I got to work on some amazing campaigns like Gwen Stefani, Enrique Iglesias, we had Girls Aloud and we put together this band called The Saturdays who were on tour with Girls Aloud and I was on the journey with these artists from the very beginning which was amazing and an exciting challenge, breaking a UK girl group. We’d do things like put on an afternoon tea with TV bookers and have the girls come meet all the different bookers from the daytime TV shows, which was fun, and they got their first TV booking on Good Morning Britain; if you look back, it’s on The Love of Huns, it's hilarious, there’s this choreographed dance that they did which was just amazing. But the one problem with them was that they needed five hours of hair and makeup, which was just a nightmare. If you had an early morning TV and they had to be camera-ready at 8am, we were getting there around 3.30 or 4am, which definitely put me in a good position for babies, for getting up early! Good training.

EL: Is that when that chapter came for you?

 RE: Not yet, that was later on. I was in my corporate role for six years and it was such a roller coaster. It was pre-Instagram, it was when Facebook was up and running but the socials weren’t so much a thing, and it was working on big TV campaigns, big TV shoots, and getting to work on some huge campaigns with artists. Sometimes we would go to New York; Carly Rae Jepson did a shoot in New York, so we were taking TV bookers to see her. The Saturdays did a video shoot in LA, so going with a TV crew to capture the behind the scenes. Really exciting.

By the time I came to the end of the six years I was feeling burned out and overwhelmed and I didn’t have any work/life balance and I just didn’t really have any space for my own personal life. Plus, at that time – and this was a good twelve years ago – we were seeing women in the industry having babies and then being made redundant and then not having a role or position in the industry. I knew that having a family was something I wanted but I couldn’t see a route for having that and being in that corporate world, so I left and set up my own company, Yes Please.

Initially it was just me. I came into it wanting to work with artists that I loved and people that I enjoyed working with. Part of the thing that I didn’t like being at a major label was all of the politics, all that kind of red tape you can have. I wanted to take all of that away, have a really nice work environment, and just enjoy that. That’s what I’ve spent the last twelve years building. I have a team of five people now, which is awesome, and I work with some amazing artists; Arlo Parks, I worked with Prince through that period when he came and did all those shows in London which was incredible, I’ve worked on the Blur comeback last year which was amazing, and Pet Shop Boys who are on tour this year, and also lots of new artists and being part of their journeys. Arlo Parks – it was amazing to be part of that kind of journey from the beginning. She won the Mercury Prize and a Brit Award and being a part of that team was so special as well, absolutely incredible.

Ruth (left) and her Yes Please team at Glastonbury 2024

But in 2020 when the lockdown happened, I had that full life rethink. Where am I at? What’s happening? I was inspired by a friend of a friend who was a coach, and she had come from a music PR background previously and was coaching music industry professionals and artists and I was like, wow, that’s such a cool thing – combining these two worlds and those two levels of experiences. So, I did that course, which was six months, and as part of it I had to take on case studies for coaching. I was coaching two people in the music industry, one on the TV and one on the industry side, and then also an artist, and going on that journey with them as well as discovering myself and what I was inspired by and how this all worked. By the end of the course, I decided that I really loved working with artists specifically. My experience sits with working with talent and being in stressful situations with them, being behind the scenes and on tours and being with them through some really incredible things and moments in their life. I wanted to help them to be present and enjoy it and get out of their own way a bit if they’re suffering from anxiety and burnout. So, I launched my coaching offering in 2020 and have been working with artists ever since. It’s been amazing.

EL: It really has! You speak about how your mission with your coaching offering is to help others become the most authentic version of themselves and empower them to move past any blocks or self-limiting beliefs that may be holding them back. Why, at that time, did you feel it was important to offer something new?

 RE: So, that period in time, I think, nobody saw it coming, and it was incredibly stressful for artists, and everyone else in the industry, and worldwide. People were having to cancel tours, rebook tours. It was completely wild. When you’re in the real world and you’re in TV studios, you’re kind of getting in the zone, you’re in the environment, you’re meeting the reception, feeling more at ease because you’re in the space of it. Artists who had release plans in place and having to change and completely 360 on what they were doing caused all sorts of issues. Being used to constantly being around inspiring individuals and people in your team and then suddenly being on your own is also very difficult. Social media became very important to artists [during that time] but there’s also a level of stress that comes with that. So that kind of inspired it. The timing of it all – artists were under more stress and pressure than ever. At the same period in time, I was a mum at that point, and I had two really young kids, one of which during the whole lockdown period started school, and it was a really difficult transition. I was sending him off for the school day with a mask on, without being able to see the space or properly meet the teacher. So, I ended up doing a group coaching session which invited other music PR mums to have space to share what they were going through, how they were handling it, sharing tips. It was such a nice way to have a connection with other mums.

Ruth and her family at Reading Festival (left) and at Glatonbury where she met her husband with the date they met on her jumpsuit (right)

EL: That’s so lovely. Something that really intrigues me is that part of your coaching process includes asking clients powerful questions. We’re seeing an increase where artists are publicly dealing with burnout, a lack of financial resources, and tensions with industry peers, often at their own labels. What are some powerful questions that you feel these artists need to be asked?

 RE: Wow, that’s a really good question and a really important question. I suppose, what does success look like to them? Because that’s different for everyone. I love Charli XCX on the brat album on one of the tracks talking about how she’s famous but not too famous, and it’s kind of really questioning that. [Some artists say] I want it all, but I don’t want to have to give up everything. There are artists that I work with where the answer to that question is, ‘I just want to keep being a musician full time and playing live,’ they don’t want to be in the top of the charts, but they want to have a sustainable and long career. There are other artists that want to be able to do the music element of the career but also do other things like release a book or do a podcast. Other artists want to find that happy place where they are doing music and creating, but not to the detriment of their mental health. There’s one artist I worked with recently who really dislikes going on tour but recognizes that it’s important to support a release. It’s helping them find that happy blend of how they can still tour without it completely becoming overwhelming, where they’re experiencing burnout. Everyone’s different.

EL: There are so many struggles that come up with artists, on tour, during a time like lockdown, etc. Managers are also struggling, and people working at labels are struggling, which it sounds like you can relate from your experience. Everyone in the music industry is struggling for their own reasons. Have you identified a common thread?

RE: Yes, I’d say a common thread is confidence and, in some instances, someone wouldn’t want to out-loud admit that but I can see that it goes hand-in-hand with things like power struggles, validation, imposter syndrome, that kind of thing. We see imposter syndrome coming up with artists but also with managers, and at labels. That’s something I see. Anxiety around social media is something that comes up a lot, particularly with artists. A lot of the artists I’ve worked with have great teams behind them that help them with third party support, which I think is really important. But even just helping them with very simple steps of phone hygiene, not looking at the comments and going through the DMs, stuff that’s not going to be good for their mental health. But yeah, anxiety, confidence, impostor syndrome.    

EL: Having identified these issues, what have you found is the best way to create an ecosystem of support, where artists, managers, and those working at labels all benefit and thrive?

 RE: The big thing is recognizing the kind of artist that you’re working with, being mindful of their personality, and how they thrive. What kind of person are they? Are they a morning person? An afternoon person? And finding a routine that works well. Being mindful of how they work best.

This year at the start of the summer, I launched a new program called Under Pressure which is specifically helping managers to deal with their artists – and it’s not telling them how to do their job, it’s more bringing the conversation to the table of let’s look at the issues we’re suffering industry wide, and right now that’s confidence issues, overwhelm, and what can we do to action that? The Under Pressure program is helping artists’ managers to slow down, take a breath, check where they’re at, how they’re doing, how their mental health is, how is their self-care? From there, let’s make sure that you’re looking after yourself, that you’re the best version of yourself to look after the talent because the music industry is very fast-paced, people expect an email answered instantly, people want to hear back on a text straight away, it feels like everyone has to be constantly switched on so it’s about trying to slow it down – because people don’t always need an immediate answer – asking for clear deadlines, really helping the artist manager look after themselves and then in return, helping them to recognize what burnout is, what does it look like, what are the red flags? How can you know if your artist might be experiencing it, what to look out for, and then on the flip-side, looking at flourishing, which is the idea that someone is in a really great flow-state, things are in a really great spot for them.

So, what it looks like when things are really good, what it looks like when things aren’t great, and red flags to look out for with burnout, and also some really simple steps to put in place to help support artists and themselves to have a healthier career that has more longevity and is more holistic. It’s finding that happy medium which is not easy, but it is possible to do, and there are certain things to put in place to work towards that.

EL: I the simplest terms, it really seems like it all comes down to everyone who’s part of the equation, looking inward and asking, how can I best care for myself as a person, and as a professional? And then, of course, your output is going to flow more, it is going to feel more organic with the people you’re working with.

So, we’ve talked about burnout, we’ve talked about confidence issues, impostor syndrome. Another question I have is, what are the top three problems you see your clients encountering, and where do you begin with tackling those problems?

 RE: We talked a little bit about social media. So, having a third party dealing with social media, if possible. There might not be budget in place for that and if that’s the case, having some really healthy working routines around social media, realizing social media is work so doing it within working hours, figuring out what those working hours are for you and figuring out when you work best.

Touring. Often, we see artists burning out for being on tour for a very long period. After the pandemic, when so much of touring stopped, it kind of went double speed and everyone was trying to get everything in. It’s starting to settle now, but people are still doing long tours. I mean look at Taylor Swift, she’s an absolute machine but Taylor has the budget, the network, the support in place where she’s going to the gym, she’s going to have a really healthy diet, all of the things that if on the flip-side if you’re a new artist, you don’t have someone who’s bringing a gym to you at the venue. But doing things like making sure you’re going for a walk at the location if you can – exercise is amazing – and encouraging everyone to eat healthily. With alcohol, there is that habit of drinking at a gig, it’s the evening, everyone’s having a pint at a show whether you’re watching or in the band. Putting in some healthy boundaries around that because if you’re in a band and you’re on tour, it is work.

Three, I think the biggest thing, is having really strong boundaries around work time and rest time. A friend of mine who works in management said, ‘I have a day off, but I sit on the sofa looking at my phone and replying to texts.’ That’s not a day off. A day off is having screen breaks, putting your phone away, not responding to emails. I got an out of office from someone on holiday saying they’ll probably still be looking at their emails. No! They shouldn’t look, and we should expect that they aren’t going to look because they’re on holiday. It’s that attitude of people being like, oh you’re away but you’re still available. No. Putting strong boundaries in and letting people know where you’re at with that, whether you’re a manager or a label exec.

Ruth at Wilderness Festival

EL: There’s so much pressure to do as much as we can, and creative people in particular often end most days feeling like they could have done more. I think that’s where the boundaries start to get compromised.

 RE: It’s so tough because you always feel like you could be doing more but you have to give yourself a break. When you’re freelance and in the creative industries, you really care about what you’re doing. So, putting a hard boundary on something is difficult because you’re very passionate about it. But not compromising your own mental health and wellbeing is so important. That’s why I want the Under Pressure workshop to really encourage managers to focus on themselves, to be their best selves and then in turn, they’ll encourage their artists to do the same.     

EL: How do you contend with working with artists who need these firm boundaries but also can have inspiration strike at any moment? Maybe in the middle of the night when an artist should be asleep and maintaining a routine, they make some really great work. How do you work with that?

 RE: What’s amazing with the coaching is that I’m coming from a place of working in the industry for the last two decades with artists. All different kinds of artist at different stages of their careers and all with their own unique personalities. But ultimately, they’re creative individuals and they’re going to have different creative sparks coming at any time of the day. Some of the work I do is all around FLOW and helping an artist identify how they get into that zone. Being in FLOW state for an artist could be when a song is just coming to them, they are in that perfect creative FLOW and there are no distractions or inner critic in that moment. Creative individuals absolutely have to follow that creative spark when it comes up. But I would encourage them to allow themselves to rest the following day to catch up on their sleep. Being fluid with the schedule where possible. One artist that I work with really struggled with being on the road, but their band is made up of friends who they trust, and the manager built in a day off every couple of days, so if they were feeling overwhelmed, they always knew they had a day off coming. Building a schedule that works well for that individual artist.

EL: Focusing on support for signed artists for a moment, in addition to an advance, do you believe that major labels should offer benefits, like mental health support, to their artists?

 RE: When I was in the major label system – it was a while ago now – it definitely looked different to how it looks today. I’ve seen lots of positive improvements but there is always room for more. Mental health is such a buzz word within the music industry now, but I think it’s so important that there is enough tangible action being done and in turn support [should be] easily accessible for employees and artists alike. It’s also about normalising mental health support within these organisations.

My intention with Under Pressure is to bring the conversation to the table; managers are at the heart of an artist’s career, so [I’m] re-enforcing how important it is to look after their own and their artists’ mental and physical wellbeing. Yes, we are all ambitious and want successful long careers but not to the detriment of our own health. Demanding more and asking a label when signing with them what measures they have in place to support the mental health of their artists is the future. Building resilience and asking for more is the way forward!

EL: That makes so much sense. For artists who are completely unsigned and without management, what is the best way for them to be getting mental health support that’s specific to their artist projects?

 RE: It’s so difficult. When you’re in that early phase as an artist, you’re everything. You might not have a manager yet, you’re doing your own socials, booking your own shows, you’re doing everything yourself and it’s incredibly difficult and stressful. As far as finding support, see what free support is available and join groups like She Said So which is an amazing industry body that has so many amazing free workshops. Building community around you with other artists and finding people doing the same things in the area you’re in. And just be open, talk about it, meet up with other people doing the same thing. The music industry is so small. And there are free programs available, there’s funding you can go for.

EL: That’s all so great. Taking it back to you now, I’m so curious, as a music industry professional, do you feel you’ve personally grown or moved past self-limiting beliefs or blocks of your own from the help of your own coaching?

 RE: What a great question! I definitely have. This summer, I took the whole month of August off, and I stayed offline and empowered my team to run the PR company, and I paused the coaching stuff for that month, and I was just with my kids, we were in France, and I just allowed myself that time and space. I knew there wasn’t anything crazy busy happening to eat at my attention. So, it was just about allowing myself to let go. There’s no way I would have done that a couple of years ago. And then I realized, I have to set my own boundaries, my own values, my own beliefs.

Ruth in Bordeaux in Summer 2024 (left) and with her children 

I’ve spoken to other music industry people since I got back – I told them I had this time off, that it was amazing, and so many of them said, ‘I’m so busy, I could never do that.’ You could do that! You have to make that happen. So, yes, it’s definitely had an impact on myself, and just even small things of coming offline at 6pm, not having my phone next to my bed, I always leave it downstairs, and I find that really works.

On the PR side, I’ve been hustling alongside building my new [coaching] business, busy pitching, working on campaigns, and there’s that expectation from management too, it’s really hard, and you have to have that balance of being committed to the project but being realistic with it too. I almost have to coach myself with that and reinforce the realistic expectations and have those difficult conversations. I always say to my team, lean into those difficult conversations, you’ll feel so much better afterwards. So, I try to really remind myself of that.

EL: You’re really practicing what you’re preaching. That’s so great. So, so wonderful. Having experienced music from all sides, what do you hope for the industry?

 RE: Another amazing question. I’m hoping that artists continue to find their authentic voice. We’ve seen Chappell Roan recently speaking up about how she’s been overwhelmed with intrusive fans, and that was really brave [of her] to come out and do that, then on the one hand, she’s dealing with people who are like, who even are you and how dare you say that, and on the other, she has this supportive community. It’s such an important conversation to have. Artists being able to truly find their authentic voice, say what they truly think and believe and having that authority with their own career. Do you know what, it’s not OK to be intrusive in my private life and I’m going to speak up about it! Also finding that balance of being an artist and doing that and really leaning in and exploring your own absolute truest, greatest potential but also being able to switch that off and being in your own personal space and having rest and being able to just be with your friends and be a normal person as well. It’s so important to find that balance.

For myself, when I became a mum was when I had to enforce strong boundaries. When I’m in mum mode and with my kids, that’s who I am. When I’m in work mode, that’s a whole separate part of me. Being able to respect and give grace to all different parts of yourself is something I’ve learned over time.

EL: That’s beautiful, I love that. What’s next from you?

 RE: Continuing to work with some amazing artists. A lot of the artists I work with, I have a pre-existing relationship with them and their management companies, so trying to broaden that out to new spaces. I’m continuing to take the Under Pressure workshop around to management companies. I took Under Pressure to The Great Escape this year so I’m going to take it to more festivals before the end of the year. And also, just growing my socials – I didn’t want to put myself under pressure of having my own social media and having to manage that, but I realize that’s where people that need help will find me. My intention is to put a monthly group call in place for people in the industry and that can be an artist or somebody at a label, a manager who just needs space to have that support and that network.

EL: That’s such a nice idea. And finally, because we are F Word Magazine, what is your favourite "F" Word?

 RE: Freedom. Freedom to be yourself and speak your truth.

Join Ruth on the 14th of October at 6pm GMT for her first monthly coaching call all about burn out. Sign up via her newsletter here for free here to get your spot!